Starting to Freak Myself Out!

I had some success with re-starting the intro diet. The B was less, but still comes back. I had D for a couple of days, then it went away… now, this morning, it’s back. The pain I have in my lower left front/side… is getting more noticeable to me now. It started in August as a little thing I noticed intermittently, now I notice it whenever I bend over or move my torso in that area. I talked with the doctor yesterday and he said if I don’t notice improvement in a week, he wants to do a scope after Thanksgiving to “see exactly what’s going on inside.” He said if the 40mg of prednisone isn’t getting me better, there may not be inflammation, and the B and D could be coming from something else. Hooray. I’m hoping I get better, but I’m somewhat actually wanting to do the scope, if only to KNOW for sure what this pain is in my lower left front side.

I started freaking myself out thinking it could be a cancerous growth or something. Now that’s stuck in my head. I just needed to vent and hear what others had to say… I’m worrying myself, and I know it’s probably for nothing, but then I start thinking, “what if it is cancer?” I’m too young for that? Then I start thinking of death, and I get all weird and depressed. I don’t want to die, I want to live a long and happy life!

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