Colitis Country Bob Will Survive

What Up UC’ers,  Please welcome Colitis Country Bob to the website.  If you want to sing along, or even crank out your guitar (come, wipe the dust off it) it’ll make you feel better!

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D C

Verse: My name’s Colitis Country Bob and I’ll tell you why

G D

When I sit on the pot, it almost makes me cry.

D C

Diarrhea don’t stop or the pain in my left side

G

I only get relief

D

From the beer and whiiiiiine.

 

 

D C

Verse: You see that white thing there, that’s my only pot

G D

I sit on top of it, but diarrhea never stops.

D C

One big roll every day, sometimes its two or three,

G D

There even was a time when I wiped with a little tree

G D

But Colitis Bob can survive

C G D

Colitis Country Bob can survive

 

 

D C

Verse: I don’t know what to do, it’s going on too long,

G D

My daddy once told me boy, you better be strong.

D C

I finally found my phone, and call up my doc,

G D

For him to come and see me, it was a very long walk.

D C

I’m gonna get better, I’m goona feel fine

G D

And a Colitis Bob can survive

C G D

Colitis Country Bob can survive

 

 

G

Chorus: Because you can’t hold it in

F

Sometimes you gotta run

C G

Cause if you poop your pants it ain’t no fun

G F

Yeah we fart all of the stinking time

C G

And if you can’t handle it, just don’t whine!

 

 

D C

Verse: So My Doc came out to see what was up,

G D

I said, turn around doc, and take a quick look

D C

He turned around and said to me:

G D

Colitis Bob can survive

C G D

Colitis Country Bob can survive

 

 

D C

Verse: He said no more drink, and that means no more wine

G D

Go get your trashcan and leave it all behind.

D C

I went back inside to clear out my stash

G D

And when I came back my doc was ripping Ass!

D C

He said go over there an tell me what you see,

G D

There were two hard logs no blood or pee.

 

D C

Verse: He told me about his I – B – D,

G D

he was diagnosed at twenty-three,

D C

He don’t drink the vodka, he don’t smoke now

G D

He used to do that stuff, but no more WOW.

C G D

YEAH! Colitis Bob can survive

C G D

Colitis Country Bob can survive!

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Take care of yourselves UC’ers, family, and friends.  If you’re not on the newsletter yet…what the heck you waiting for?  There’s a pretty sweet 43 page free ebook (pdf file) you’ll receive in your inbox that’s got some super awesome info in it.

Good luck Country Bob,

-Adam Scheuer

 






17 thoughts on “Colitis Country Bob Will Survive”

  1. Adam,
    YOU and CCBob Rocked it! Funny and serious all rolled in one…guitar and singing…awesome…you been taking lessons?! Most improved award to you! (My first comment got lost in space!)
    Great message…listen up UC’ers….1 thing you can actually control that is known to adversely affect us uc’ers…easy choice it seems when weighing the consequences.
    Kudos Adam! Encore! Will be waiting for CCBob’s next adventure!
    Best, Shelly

    1. Thanks Shelly,

      I you know we are all waiting for you to crank out the old GEEEtar!
      And no lessons needed, youtube does it all!
      (Although proper lessons would be way cool!)

      -Adam

  2. Colitis Country Bob rocks! He really cheered me up tonight after a day of christmas shopping and having to run to the toilet (nearest cafe) ten minutes into it so my mum had to buy us drinks so we didnt seem rude, thanks mum and CCB!

    1. Hey there Maggie,
      if Country bob is cheering you up, that’s super cool. I’m going to talk to him and see if he can’t maybe practice up some new chords for an encore in the future.

  3. Country Bob, you rock and put smiles on all those that are suffering with this crappy disease. Thanks for bringing smiles to my face, knowledge and understanding to my brain with your website and song.
    All the best to you and thanks for what you do for mankind…
    Lee

  4. Adam,
    I wish you could repost for people or write and sing part 2,dos, deux, DUH!! :-)

    Spring forward!
    Best, as always, Shelly

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