16 Turning Mid 70’s

Being a teenager but feeling 70 years old.
Its hard enough being a teen girl battling the stupid images media shoves down our throat day after day.
But being haunted by this horrible, painful demoralizing disease and being a girl at sixteen is such a struggle even by me typing that right now makes me feel like I am making an understatement.

The truth is, I used to be a teenager who loved to get drunk and high and have boys always surrounding me.
It sounds horrible and typical and I see that now but thats honestly how I was.
And thats how all my friends are.
By this I mean i mean my friends are the typical 21st century self obsessed popularity ranked kings and queens of this society I live in.

But now being diagnosed with my Chrones and colitis, Yes, I have both and they are both severe levels.
Its hard to go out and be the girl I once knew only 11 months ago being myself.
I smoke to relive my pain while im surrounded by my friends smoking to get high and have a stupid time.
Where as I’m sitting there thinking this is pathetic look at me im doing this to get rid of my arthritis and they are doing it to forget their worries whilst im doing it to be able to walk and be able to laugh without having the feeling of my gut being squeezed and turned like a rope.

I truly have lost friends because I gained weight. Because I gained weight… honestly?
I was 10 kilos too ugly for my ‘friends’.
Steroids do that to you though dont they?”
They make you feel lonely when you have massive amounts of love around you from nurses and family
They make you feel angry and cold.
And they make you eat like theres no tomorrow.
I put 14 kilos on in one week and another 4 in the next.
The doctors told me they would make me better make me happy again they were wrong it wasn’t happiness they were offering it was a lie 2 weeks on steroids turned into 10 weeks on steroids.

I dont trust my body or my doctors anymore and neither my friends.

This story was submitted in the colitis venting section

4 thoughts on “16 Turning Mid 70’s”

  1. My heart goes out to you. I remember what it was like being 16 (28 now). I didn’t have colitis at the time, and even without that, it is a pretty tough time.

    I know the prenisone messed with my head, I was on it for a week, came off it, ended up in hospital, back on it for 4 weeks which turned into 3 months, then came off it and ended up in hospital again, and back on it for another 3 months. I grew facial hair, I gained weight (which was good for me then as I’d lost 12kgs), I had mood swings – I’d run out of meetings at work to cry in the bathroom for no apparent reason. Try to remember that, no matter how much you feel like you are alone, you are not. People care about you, and want you to get well and be happy.

    You don’t need friends who make you feel bad about yourself. I know it’s easy to say and hard to do (particularly at 16), but don’t hang out with people who pull you down.

    Persevere, you’ll find something that makes you well, and people who make you feel good.

    Best wishes,


  2. Far be it for me to lecture a 16 year old but I remember what I was like at that age and all the things I did wrong including hanging around with the wrong people. Drinking and taking drugs at your age is not good and neither is hanging around with people who judge friendship on the way you look, you are better that that. You may not trust your body but you can try to understand and come to terms with its peculiarities, you will then become stronger mentally and definitely stronger than your fair weather friends who, if they continue as they are, are going nowhere in life. As for your doctors, give them a chance. It may seem all they are doing is not helping but in time they will find something that is suitable for your unique self and ease your pain. You can even help yourself by researching and experimenting with different foods that agree with you, I’d even recommend you buy a book by a lady ‘Dede’ who contributes to this forum, I sure you will find it very helpful. Her book ‘Living with Crohn’s & Colitis’ by Jessica Black, N.D. & Dede Cummings. Keep in there, you are special and too young to feel bad about yourself. Chin up.

  3. Hey,

    Dont let people bring you down, your so-called “friends” are not real friends! Real friends would stick with you and support you through the bad times! You don’t need them!

    With regards to the chrons and colitis have you looked into changing your diet? It could make you feel so much better! i’ve been on the SCD diet for 6 months and it has really changed my life!

    Look into it, its worth a shot!

    Good Luck and keep your head up!

    We cannot let this disease control our lives!

  4. I was always into the partying and hanging out with friends scene when I was in high school. I graduated and was ready for the big party(college), two years after I graduated I started getting really sick and had no idea what it was. I made my restroom my bestfriend. I was going to the restroom more than I could count, my cramps were so severe. From being a party animal, I was a 19 year old that didn’t want to do anything but stay home, and sleep, because that was the only time I wouldnt hurt. I finally made my way to the hospital. I’m now 20 and I can’t say I’m fine, but I am a whole lot better then I was 6 months ago.I haven’t had a drink for 1year, I go out with friends and party still. I guess it’s time for me to get onto this diet and see how t goes for me. Goodluck to you all, wish you luck.

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